Chinese Waiter

After church yesterday, we went to Hunan Chef for lunch. The waiter who took our order
did not speak very good English. The guy who served our food and refilled our drinks, however, was quite fluent in our language.

I didn't realize the fluent waiter had barely walked away when Joel said, "He must have used Rosetta Stone."

We all cracked up.

The guy returned in a few minutes with more rice, and asked if everything was okay, and did we want more tea, he'd bring a new pot. We said more tea would be great, thanks. He headed to the kitchen.

Joel piped up again, "Yeh, that guy DEFINITELY used Rosetta Stone!"

Changed His Mind about Being a Dad

A few months ago (when he was maybe six or just turned seven), Joel told me he didn't want to be a dad because "It's WAY too hard to raise a child."

Well, he changed his mind recently. Last night on the way to WalMart he said, "Mom, remember how I said I didn't want to be dad? Well, now I do."

"Oh, really?" I asked. "How come?"

"Because if you're a dad, you can just say, 'Bring me some chips' and your kid has to bring you chips. Or you say 'please hang this phone back up' and your kid has to hang it up."

Trying to hide my smile, I said, "So, then, you mean you want to have kids as slaves?"

"Yes. Exactly. I'm Slave Number 4."

What "Corny" Means

Joel had to accompany me to my Weight Watchers meeting yesterday (poor little guy). What 7 year old enjoys that?--
especially when, at the end, the leader says to the group, "Okay, now, I want everyone to stand and learn a cheer."

A cheer? Seriously? My cheerleading days ended in 10th grade. I'm grown up now. I don't pay 12 bucks a week to feel like an idiot. But if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. So we stood.

The leader gets everyone to stand and cross their arms below the waist, wrists up. Then she leads us in the "cheer" : we uncross them in a (less than) exuberant sweep while saying "hip, hip, away". That's it.

A few minutes later, after we were in the van, Joel says, "Hip, hip hooray? Mom, that cheer was dumb."

"Well, it wasn't 'hip, hip, hooray, it was 'hip, hip, away, as in 'make our big hips go away.'"

'That's just--"

"Corny?" I asked.

"Yeh, corny. You know what 'corny' means? It means "clever in a dumb sort of way.' "