Do Birds Have Butts?

Such was the question I fielded today. Nearly choked on my salsa.

How Do You Spell "Cartoon"?

Joel was wanting to play on CartoonNetwork.com a few days ago. I had my hands in dishwater.

He was sittting on the sofa with the laptop open.

"How do you 'pell "Cartoon Network?" he asked me. "I know how to 'pell "cartoon" but not "network."

I was skeptical. He's four years old. Maybe he could spell "car" but I doubted the rest.

"Oh, really? You can spell 'cartoon'?"

"Yeah. C-A-R-T-O-O-DOWN ARROW KEY-ENTER."

If it's in the Way

A couple of days ago Joel was helping me plant flowers in the front garden. He said many funny things. At one point, I was bent over in front of him, digging. Standing behind me, he said, rather disgruntled-like, "Move your big butt."

"Joel!" I scolded, turning to face him with a scowl. "That is NOT nice. It's a a very disrespectful thing to tell your mother."

He put out his hands, palms up, and explained. "Well, if something's in the way, you move it."

I had to turn back around to hide my grin. Deep down I knew I should have kept a straight face and given him a follow-up to the first reprimand, but I could barely hold in the snorts. You know exactly what I'm talking about.